In this episode, We answer the concern: exactly exactly exactly What do you really text a lady you’ve simply slept with?

Masculinity for the Smart Guy. I will be David Tian, Ph.D., and also this is: Man Up.

Fine, welcome to episode 14. We’ve got another concern from Matthew. It’s a quickie: So what does a genuine guy text up to a girl he’s simply slept because of the next morning?

Scenario A, he really wants to see her once more.

Situation B, most likely does not wish to see her once again but he does not wish to be a douche bag and simply not text her again. Thanks. Okay, cool. That’s a pretty hassle free question: exactly just What should you text a female you simply slept with in the event that you like her, in the event that you don’t like her.

In the event that you like her, if you wish to see her again – actually in the event that you’ve simply slept with one another also it’s the next morning one of the better activities to do is simply to solidify that connection. One of several worst emotions a woman gets – if you provided her a very good time in bed and also you linked and all sorts of that material, in the event that you don’t want her to feel bad as to what just took place – just don’t treat her just like a prostitute.

If she’s got to immediately after sex, roll away from sleep, put her garments on and perform some stroll of pity out of the home and you’re just like, “Oh hey, bye,” – you’re going to help make her feel low priced. However, if you’re attentive and you also don’t simply kick her away or any such thing. Or if you’re at her destination, you don’t simply roll down and place your clothing on and go out. So long as you don’t do this like, wham-bam-thank-you-ma’am kind of approach you then ought to be fine. As this is the contemporary globe, they are present times and grownups realize these characteristics. It is simply the encounter that is first you don’t expect marriage yet out of this for the majority of contemporary individuals.

A simple action to take if you like more, should you want to suss away whether she will be interested in having a lot more of a relationship to you then once you have intercourse it is possible to get make a move else. After you have intercourse, each morning – or once you’ve intercourse possibly each day or immediately after sex, if it is morning hours, you’ll get to get some meals. Like some dinner, Singaporeans call it, or an earlier morning meal together then deliver her down, send her proceed this link here now home, make certain she gets house.

Those are great activities to do should you want to make her feel much better in regards to the whole thing – good about any of it, i am talking about, instead of just experiencing want it had been an inexpensive wham-bam-thank-you-ma’am thing. You are able to deliver her down or perhaps you can have morning meal together and that is really effortless. Over morning meal it is possible to talk and get just to understand her.

And if she arrives to you for break fast following the deed, she’s down. She’s down for more. She really wants to see you once again and, you understand, this will be a thing that is good. So that it solidifies the bond – having break fast the following early morning together may help solidify that. Therefore then you don’t want to do this whole: just exactly just what do we text her? – Right?

Now, if she’s got to head to work or if perhaps you don’t have time to obtain morning meal together or you’re both rushing down to get results and you simply get yourself a coffee together – so you don’t have enough time for the break fast – you just send her a good text making sure she surely got to her location, ensuring she’s secure, one thing chivalrous like this.

Or something like that simply enjoyable, so perchance you usually takes a photograph of one’s croissant you had and say one thing like, “Ooh a croissant that is warm the early early early morning.” Something similar to that, simply casual – just ping her, simply make contact to exhibit her that you’re still interested in her besides simply for this encounter that is physical.

It absolutely wasn’t simply a means of tricking her into sleep and today you don’t anymore need her. That’s the easier and simpler situation to resolve. Essentially, you are able to simply ping her like friend – in other words, ensure that it stays casual. Which means you don’t would you like to get like, “Okay, whenever do you wish to get married?” You don’t like to go heavy yet but just establish some contact that’s fun or better yet, aim for break fast together or even for a late night thing – food.

Situation B, in the event that you don’t would you like to see her again. All right, so that the real question is at exactly what point do you determine her again that you don’t want to see? So if it absolutely was before intercourse you decided that and you obtain the sense that she wishes a relationship or desires to see you once more then that which you’ve done the following is you’ve simply done something where you knew which you had been dealing with a obligation, in this way, and you also experienced along with it anyhow.

Therefore in the event that you knew the consequence emotionally that you’d have on her behalf and you also experienced along with it anyhow, you types of had been the douche case. You’ve currently done douche case things, you type of just fucked it up and now you’re in damage control.

Which means you said: in the event that you probably don’t want to see her once again. Now in the event that you decided you don’t would you like to see her once more as you didn’t have intimate chemistry – this basically means, you didn’t understand whether you might have sexual chemistry unless you surely got to the bed room and had been doing the deed after which you decided here simply is not this sort of chemistry.

But then presumably you liked her – like as a friend if you got to that point, if you got to the point where you’re having sex. Now you simply have to be actually, actually apparent it’s just something casual with her that.

Therefore at this time you truly need to be careful concerning the regularity of contact so that you don’t deliver the incorrect message. You need to be careful in regards to the plain things you truly say so you don’t say anything that’s too commitment driven or commitment implications. Or in other words, don’t plan vacations together if that’s the actual situation.

Don’t plan out just exactly how you’re going to have children together. Don’t do any future projection that is serious because those are typical planning to have her taking into consideration the both of you down the line, as time goes on. That’s simply misleading. Remain in the now, remain in the minute .